The Year So Far

We’re almost half way through 2017 and I’m not quite sure how that happened. This has probably been one of the most trying years of my life and I’m still trying to cope with everything that’s been happening. For months, I’ve been dealing with some extremely costly and frustrating issues on the home front, but that pales in comparison to the losses I’ve endured. I recently lost my grandma and I’m still trying to figure out life without her. I’ve also lost two beloved pets within 8 months of each other. If you know me, you know that my pets are my family and all of these losses have torn out pieces of my heart. Many nights, my dreams are filled with terror. I feel exhausted most of the time. I haven’t painted in so long. I just don’t feel the longing to create right now. I feel hollow. I’m trying to push myself to at least photograph the animals and plants that I love. Doing so gives me the opportunity to spend time with them and takes my mind off the anxieties that I can’t seem to shake otherwise. I know that I am absolutely blessed in so many ways, but I think healing is going to take time. I just need some time.